Learn to embrace vulnerability

It's been an emotional journey for me in the past two days.  Lessons learned:

1. Don't listen to your friends sometimes, despite however good intention they have.  They aren't you and don't know what exactly you've been through.  You, and only you, could make the decision for yourself. 

2. Sometimes you make the decision and you feel dreadful afterwards and you start to doubt yourself whether or not you've made a wrong choice.  THINK CAREFULLY.   Has the pain interfered with your mind?  Have you chosen the rare and unsafe route that normal people wouldn't dare to and a sudden thought of failing and losing more than you already have has crept into your mind?  Or have you really made a wrong choice?

In my case, and I've thought very carefully, that I've made a painful and difficult choice.  I've made a bad choice but a right one - right, according to my heart.  Most people would choose the easy way - well, it seems easier anyway although life wouldn't end easy just because of an easy choice you've made - and I too wanted to choose it, and am still attempted to choose it, but I'm resisting.  It is heart-breaking, but it seems the right thing to do.

I wouldn't say here what it is because it's too complicated.  I've never had such a dilemma in my life that just drains every bits out of you every day.  It is depressing and exhausting.  My point is (yes, please bear with me, I know it's the 3rd paragraph already), don't, don't, don't set boundaries to yourself because you've been told to do certain things at a certain age supposedly in life.  Don't easily give up on your interpretation of life and your way of living life, however people called you an idiot or loser.  Don't follow the paths of the majority - no matter how lonely and rough the path you choose would lead you - if your heart tells you this is it.

3. Learn to embrace your vulnerability.  It's the acceptance of your imperfectness gives you space walking towards perfection. 

Preparation for the UK YMS Trip 1 - Why UK

I still remember I had the wishes written down on the 寶碟 and have it tossed over the tree around CNY last year.  Yes, one of it was "going on a working holiday trip to the UK in the near future".  I promised myself that I would "find an answer to my life" if I ever go there.

So, why the UK?  Oh, there're so many reasons to state.  The UK has so much links with HK to start with.  And yes I'm the ones who have been mainly influenced by the western cultures when I grew up (rather than Japanese or Korean).  Though awkwardly, my love for the British culture came during my 5-year stay in Australia. Hahaha.  You couldn't imagine how Aussies love the British and hate the Yanks (Yeah, I don't know why, 'cause I'm more prone to the US before that).

Anyway, I started to listen to more British music, movies, TVs, comedies, and most of them are soooo fab!  And because I'm still quite attached to the old colonial days in HK, and because how I found the English and Chinese are so much alike (I mean the really traditional Chinese culture, in terms of literature and rituals), I would really enjoy finding out how the English live, and seeing their culture and historical sites with my own eyes.  Lastly, I thought I would give myself one last chance to be a free spirit.  To just go and explore the world before settling down in a place, work like a slave, get married or not and die.

Now, after nearly a year making the wish, there's a chance that I could make it happen.  There're lots to think about but I'm doing it.  I might have a friend with me too but it's not definite yet.  I'll need to do some homework otherwise I might already be leaving one month after setting foot in the land.  I've came across a few blogs on the web about UK working holiday (officially called as Youth Mobility Scheme) - it's not as popular yet as the Australia WHS since only BNO holders can apply for it - you could hardly find a book about it so the internet really helps a lot.  So I decided to write down my journey too - before, during and after - and perhaps a few tips so that any other who is interested could get something out of it, as I really appreciate those who wrote down theirs.  It really meant a lot!

P.S. And I got an excuse to get my 10-year expired BNO renewed!

My joke collection 1

Joke inspired by my postcard experience:

I just realise that I didn't know where my friends live until I asked them for their addresses for the postcards. It's not the same anymore right? We used to write letters to our friends and post them to their actual addresses where they actually lived.  Now that I could imagine, when you asked somebody their address, they would say, "Well, I live in Hotmail. It's not too big, it only has 2 gigabytes." "Well, why not getting a property in Gmail? It has 25 gig and it's free!"  (Sorry I didn't really check the actual storage of both providers :P)

It's really hard for me to pin down where people live now 'cause I only know three estates in the world and yeah we surely are turning into a global village.

Haha, feel free to comment and I hope I'd gather more jokes here in the future. :) I love comedy.